If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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