a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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