he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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