My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
