sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize