This girl is more easily done than said...
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
