I would go down on you faster than GM stock
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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