i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
