so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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