I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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