He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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