He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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