She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
