I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
