but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
