Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
