apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize