so that wasnt chicken after all
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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