is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Let's paint friendship bongs
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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