Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
