I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
