i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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