Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
