i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize