Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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