I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
