He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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