white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
