i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
my poor anus
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
