As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He kissed a someone with a penis
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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