yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
