And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
