I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
