i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
