I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
