You're my little dorito
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
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