If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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