Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
