My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
two words: eviction party
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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