Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
