he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
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