I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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