that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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