you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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