I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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