I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
