that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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