We're like a lot better than the average bears
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
home. puking in laundry basket.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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