He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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