Betty ford says i'm here all night
Acid is not a monday night drug
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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